Je Ne L'aime Pas

Paris, I Love You, But You’re Bringing Me Down
Rosecrans Baldwin
Memoir

I know what you’re thinking. Another Paris memoir? It’s true, I just can’t enough of Paris. Well, France. French culture in general. At times I think it would be awesome to move there. Put my French minor to good use (although since I graduated six years ago, my grasp of French has dwindled considerably). But this book mainly caught my attention because of the title. Not your usual Paris-is-awesome shtick.

Rosecrans Baldwin lands an advertising job in Paris and takes his wife along for the ride. They relocate from NYC (just like in Paris, My Sweet) and struggle with adjusting to Parisian life.

Again, I couldn’t helping comparing this to David Lebovitz’s The Sweet Life in Paris and finding it lacking. Baldwin isn’t as funny as Lebovitz, though there are a few amusing moments. What I appreciated most was his candor. A lot of memoirs wax poetic about how great living in Europe is, how wonderful life becomes. But Baldwin mentions over and over all the paperwork, the sayings that are lost in translation and how difficult his job is because he doesn’t speak French. On the other hand, by the end of the book, I got sick of him bitching about how he couldn’t understand anyone at work. Get a tutor, dude.

Too much of the book was taken up with his complaining, which makes sense, considering the title. I just wish he’d gone into more detail about the food, his apartment, the city. I know Paris isn’t perfect, but I’d like to imagine it is. And keep my fantasy of one day living abroad in a big European city alive and well.

Anyone who’s ever lived in Paris will probably enjoy this, and anyone who’s thinking of moving there. But I still recommend The Sweet Life in Paris more. Much more.

Not What It Seems

First You Try Everything
Jane McCafferty
Fiction

Wow. This book is…wow. Not at all what I was expecting. Actually, I didn’t even read the whole inside flap when I picked it up, just the first few sentences. I saw that it was about a married couple drifting apart, and slipped it in my bag. Little did I know what a rollercoaster ride I would be getting on.

First You Try Everything is about a couple named Evvie and Ben. They’ve been married for awhile, no children, one dog, and they’re happy. Or so Evvie thinks. Ben is not so happy. He wants out of the marriage. He informs Evvie of this and they separate. And that’s when things start to get crazy. In more ways than one.

I’ll just get my minor nitpick out of the way first: too many long paragraphs. I hate long paragraphs and must resist the urge to skin when I see them. I tried not to with this book because Ms. McCafferty is an awesome writer. The tone of the book is so serious that the few comedic passages are really funny. Probably because I just wasn’t expecting them. The characters are all real and sympathetic. I don’t think I disliked anyone in this book (can’t remember the last time that happened with a novel). And I could never see what was coming. Sometimes I like that in a book and sometimes I don’t. This time, I did. The ending satisfied me as well. Not too depressing, but happy—or satisfying, I guess I should say—enough that it made sense for Evvie and Ben to end up like they did.

First You Try Everything is a great book about marriage, relationships, and the human psyche. Anyone who enjoys being delighted by clever writing, witty dialogue, and insightful characters should read it.

Black & Blue

What Happened to Hannah
Mary Kay McComas
Fiction

This book confused me. I wanted to like it, but I didn’t. No, scratch that, I did like it, but only parts of it. Very, very few parts. The rest I skimmed and wished they’d been better.

What Happened to Hannah begins with a man named Grady calling a woman named Hannah and letting her know her mother is dead and her niece needs her (Hannah's sister died a long time ago and mom's been raising her). Hannah reluctantly agrees to come home. Hannah and Grady have a history, of course, and Hannah has lots of deep, dark secrets that she is forced to deal with when she returns to her hometown.

I’m not a big fan of the woman-was-abused-when-she-was-younger-then-flees-but-now-must-return-home-to-face-her-demons plot. So I probably should not have picked up this book. But the quote from Nora Roberts on the front about how the author “weaves stories that brighten the heart” suckered me in. Now, I know abuse happens in real life, believe me I know, but I find it really hard to read about, even in fiction. It’s just too depressing for me. And I really did like Hannah, but having to read those scenes where she remembers her father hurting her were rough.

On the plus side, I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the love story. I loved the flashbacks to Grady and Hannah’s first meeting and how he courted her, those scenes were sweet and romantic. The present day courting was not quite as good, however. And the final scene between the two was a bit of a letdown. I also found myself wanting to hear more from Lucy and Cal, Grady’s kids from his first marriage. They were very interesting but since the only POVs were Hannah and Grady, we didn’t get as much from them as I would have liked.

So I don’t really know what to say about this book. If you can stomach woman-overcoming-her-horrific-past stories, you’ll enjoy it. If you’re kind of a wimp like me, you might want to skip this one.

Music Makes the People Come Together

How the Mistakes Were Made
Tyler McMahon
Fiction

I haven’t done an issues posts in quite awhile, so I figured it’s time for another. Especially since I have many issues with this book. The only thing I loved about it was the title. The book is about a band called The Mistakes, how they formed, how they got famous, and the downside of that fame. I really enjoy clever titles and when I caught on to this one, I smiled with pleasure, hoping it was a sign this book would be good. But alas, it wasn’t.

Issue #1: Narrative. The first chapter begins in first person. The next chapter switches to second person. Then back again to first person. Then back to second person. And so on and so on. I hate second person. No good has ever come of it and it jolts me right out of the story.

Issue #2: Characters. I did not like the main character, Laura. I probably wasn’t supposed to, and I did feel sorry for her at points, but I never warmed to her. The other two band members, Nathan and Sean, I was okay with. Nathan only sort of, and Sean more so when we got to see what his family life was like. But Laura was just a black hole of whine and sourpuss. And she didn’t seem to give a crap about the fact that she essentially destroyed a few lives to get what she wanted.

Issue #3: Perspective. Okay, I might get rotten tomatoes thrown at me for this, but this book is written in first person from a woman’s POV. And it’s written by a guy. The fact of the matter is, I couldn’t help remembering that over and over, especially when Laura did or thought or stated something that didn’t sound anything like how a female would do, think, or phrase something. Now, I’m a writer myself and I’m certainly not one of those people who believes men can only write male POVs and women can only write female POVs. I’ve read plenty of books by men about women and never given it a second thought. But not How the Mistakes Were Made. I just felt like Mr. McMahon was totally off-base in regards to Laura.

Issue #4: Ending. Bad ending. I mean, you could see it coming (there were tons of foreshadowing comments, another thing that drives me insane) but I still hated it. The book was a downer and the ending kept that theme going.

How the Mistakes Were Made has some good info about Seattle and punk and grunge and what it’s like when a small-time band blows up, so musicians will probably enjoy it. But there were just too many problems for me.

Silence is Golden

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking
Susan Cain
Psychology

I read this book in one day. One day, people. That means you need to go out and buy it right now! Or check it out of the library (yeah, on second thought, do not shell out $26.00 for a book you’ve never read). Also, you’ll probably be more interested in this book if you’re an introvert. But extroverts can read it, too. They’ll definitely learn something.

Did your teacher ever write on your report cards that they wished you spoke up more in class? Dear god, I hated that. Perhaps you’d rather curl up on the sofa with your pet and a good book Saturday night than go out to a club and get hit on by drunken jackasses. I definitely would. In our American culture, being an introvert is usually painted in a negative light. We’re encouraged to not be alone so much, to talk more, be more open, expressive ourselves, be more social (boy, have I heard that one more times than I’d prefer). But being an introvert doesn’t mean you’re lonely or have less friends or have less fun. Susan Cain delves into the psyche of introverts in fascinating and detailed ways. She discusses why extroverts are so valued in our society and how introverts differ, but in good ways. Once we know what makes introverts behave the way we do, she gives advice on how we can thrive in school, in work, and in our personal relationships. She even has a chapter on learning how to get along better with the people in your life who are extroverts.

Now I finally understand that it was okay that in school I hated to be put in groups for projects. I worked much better by myself, as most introverts do. Oh, how I wish this book had come out years ago. It really is an eye-opening read. Everyone can get something from it.

Bad Teacher

Lies My Teacher Told Me: Everything Your High School History Textbook Got Wrong
James W. Loewen
History

My history classes in high school sucked. I vividly remember the class I took junior year (American/Arizona History, I think it was called). My teacher was a former football player and at the start of every new chapter in our textbook, we had to make a timeline of all the events we were going to read about. The more color and pictures your timeline had, the better your grade. That’s right, we were graded on our coloring ability. In a high school class. So you can see why history was never my favorite subject in high school. In college I took an American History class that I quite enjoyed, however (and realized yet again how much better college is than high school).

I’d heard about this book so when I saw it on the shelf, I scooped it up. I also want to point out that this is the revised edition. I never read the first one, so I really cannot compare the two, but I suppose reading the most current edition of any book is a good idea.

Lies My Teacher Told Me is pretty appalling. But in a good way. Mr. Loewen goes through several key points in history and tells us what the textbooks left out. Most notably, that Woodrow Wilson was a huge racist and pretty much everything about Christoper Colombus is a lie (it’s actually astounding to me now that we have a holiday for that man). Mr. Loewen also tells us how wrong we are about the first Thanksgiving. Oh, so wrong. I couldn’t believe what I was reading during most of this book. Some of it is hard to take. And in the end it makes me feel really sorry for history teachers who are stuck with these awful, dishonest textbooks.

Everyone should read this book, even if you disliked history as much as I did (which, according to Loewen, is true of most people). Your eyes will widen with disbelief, your stomach will churn. But you will learn a lot, and that is the true power of reading.

Home Is Where the Heart Is

Blue Moon Bay
Lisa Wingate
Fiction

Again, love the cover of this book. It’s just gorgeous. But the great cover doesn’t make up for all the crazy plot twists. Good lord, the plot twists! This book was like a soap opera, and not in a good way (I used to watch lots of daytime soaps, for the record).

Blue Moon Bay is the story of Heather Hampton, an architect from Seattle who flies down to her hometown, Moses Lake, Texas, to sell the family farmland. But when she gets there, she gets the feeling everyone, her mom, brother, uncles, even high school crush Blaine, is hiding something from her. And boy is she right.

I should’ve known from the start that this book would have slight religious undertones, considering the name of the town is Moses Lake. But it wasn’t too in-your-face, which I appreciated. I liked Heather. Watching her transform from a business-obsessed yuppie to an enoying-life-as-it-comes homebody was nice. My only other real problem with the book, besides all the twists and turns towards the end, was the whole we’re-keeping-secrets thing. Now, I know this is the plot of many books. A lot of my own books involve secrets and deceptions. However, Heather suspects right from the start that something’s fishy but it takes until practically the end of the book before her mom, brother, and Blaine start confessing. I just got annoyed by the countless scenes of Heather wanting to know what was going on and everybody refusing to tell her or making her feel like she was crazy for being so suspicious. It dragged the book out and made me impatient.

Lisa Wingate has written a few other books, so if you liked those, you’ll probably like this. But for anyone who gets annoyed when everyone in the main character's life is lying to her, Blue Moon Bay is not the book for you.

History Lesson

By the King’s Design
Christine Trent
Fiction

I like history books, I really do. Unfortunately, I just can’t seem to get into historical fiction. It’s the cynic in me. The cynic whispers when I’m reading, whispers about how there's no way Jane Austen actually said that and no way did those words come out of King George IV's mouth. Still, I pick up these historical fiction books, hoping someday I’ll discover one so good it sucks me in. Sadly, this book was not it.

By the King’s Design is about a woman named Belle who runs her family draper shop with her brother. Belle travels to London when her shop is destroyed, wants to see the Prince Regent to get him to do something about it, and somehow ends up being commissioned to design fabrics for his Royal Pavilion. Then she meets this guy she likes and finds out her brother’s into illegal activities and…I can’t fill you in on the rest because I skipped to the end.

This book bored me. There wasn’t enough romance. Too much historical stuff (and yes, I know this is a stupid statement). It’s odd how much I enjoy historical non-fiction, yet when it comes to historical fiction, I just can’t get into it. I wish I could, because Christine Trent is a good writer. Maybe if Belle had been more interesting I would’ve made it to the end. Alas, she wasn’t and I realized I could not keep forcing myself on. Also, her love interest’s name is Put. My mind would instantly go to a golf course when he entered a scene. I cannot take character's with dumb names seriously (just to be clear, his full name was Putnam, but still.)

Ms. Trent has written two other books, so if you enjoyed those, I’m sure you’ll enjoy this one. It just wasn’t my cuppa tea (another dumb statement since I don’t even like tea).

Paint by Numbers

The Woman Who Heard Color
Kelly Jones
Fiction

Yet another book where I liked the cover so I picked it up. Kelly Jones is a new author (to me) so I decided to give her a try. I should’ve read the back more carefully, however. Because the word “art” is mentioned quite a lot. Should’ve been my first clue I’m not the right audience for this book.

Let’s start with gripe number one. This novel uses a framing device. I hate framing devices. I prefer straight-forward story-telling. In present day, we follow Lauren, an art detective, who makes an appointment with Isabella, an older woman she believes knows more about artwork stolen by the Nazis during World War II than she’s letting on. Isabella decides to spill all to Lauren and tells her about her mother, Hanna, another art lover who could hear colors in paintings and helped the Nazis get rid of art. Except she didn’t really. Not in the way you think. It’s quite a complicated plot, actually. But, like I said, I hate framing devices. It takes me out of the story going back-and-forth like that.

Gripe number two is stupid but I’ll put it out there: too much art! I realize this is a ridiculous complaint since art is such a huge part of the book, but much as I love walking around museums and gazing up at beautiful paintings, it’s so much better to see it than hear about it. I found myself skimming a lot.

Gripe number three is a loose plot end that I was annoyed never got tied up. It made sense for the story, but it still annoyed me. Hey, I’m petty and that’s what this blog is for, to complain about the little things.

Art lovers will enjoy this book, I’m sure. As will mystery and history lovers. But if you loathe framing (ha, no pun intended, I swear) and could not care less about Van Gogh or Cezanne, leave this one on the shelf.

Party Like a Rock Star

Shut Up and Give Me the Mic
Dee Snider
Memoir

I feel like I shouldn’t be writing a review for this book. I have never, nor will I probably ever, be into Twisted Sister and that style of music. I mean, I’ve heard We’re Not Gonna Take It (who hasn’t?), but I’m not at all into rock/glam/heavy metal. The only reason I picked this book up was because I read the inside jacket and was intrigued to discover Mr. Snider met his future wife when he was twenty, fell for her right away, he’s never cheated on her, and they have four kids. So I read it for the love story. Not the music.

Which brings me to my problem. Most of the book is about the music. Fair enough, it’s a rock and roll memoir, I knew that going in. So I skimmed. A lot. I was really only interested in his family life. Unfortunately, I think reading Michael Ian Black’s surprisingly romantic book earlier (see post entitled The Real Deal) spoiled me for other memoirs because this one blew my mind. And not in a good way. Mr. Snider meets his future wife, Suzette, when he’s twenty and she’s only fifteen! To up the weirdness factor, turns out she doesn't even like him or feel attracted to him when they meet. He falls head-over-heels. Not her, though. But then it gets weirder. She tries and tries to break up with him over the course of the next few years. He refuses (I thought that only happened on Seinfeld?). Eventually he wears her down and talks her into marriage. How romantic, right? As I was reading this, I just kept thinking, is he for real? It would’ve been nice to get Suzette’s side of the story to make sure he didn’t really force her into marrying him, but that’s pretty much what it sounded like. Good lord.

Then there’s Mr. Snider’s writing. I admire the fact that he wrote this monster tomb all by himself. However, he needs to do away with the footnotes (again with stupid footnotes!) and the italics (again with annoying italics!). The italics bothered me the most because almost all of them were completely unnecessary. Some of them even took away from the jokes he was trying to make.

If you’re a fan of Twisted Sister or Dee Snider, you’ll enjoy this book because it has lots of details on the music business and backstage gossip. Otherwise, don’t bother. A grand lovestory it ain’t.

A Mile in My Shoes

Rez Life
David Treuer
Historical/Memoir

I almost gave up on this book a few times. There were so many long paragraphs. Paragraphs that seemed to go on forever. I probably thought about shoving it to the bottom of my book pile at least three times. But something deep inside made me finish. Which is weird, because I am one of those people who can easily toss a book aside if I don’t like it, no matter how deep into it I am.

A few months ago I read another book about reservation life that I quite enjoyed, which is why I wanted to read this one. Alas, the other book was most definitely a memoir while this book is part memoir, part history book. It's about an Indian and his thoughts and feelings on the Native American people of today. I wanted to like it. I did. The subject matter is fascinating. But I just got the feeling that it’s probably more fascinating if you’re Native American. If you’re not, the bulky paragraphs and long, detailed explanations of government and tribal laws becomes a bit tedious. I wanted to hear more from Indians still living on the reservations. I wanted to know their stories, their hardships, their triumphs.

Ah, well. If you’re interested in Native American history and reservation life, you’ll probably like this book. But you also must like loooong paragraphs. Okay, I’ll shut up about the paragraphs now.

Blood Ties

The Sacred Thread: A True Story of Becoming a Mother and Finding a Family—Half a World Away

Adrienne Arieff
Memoir

I’m not a mother yet (I hope to be one someday), but I’m still interested in books about adoption and surrogacy. What if I can’t get pregnant? I’ll definitely want to look into my options. The Sacred Thread is a story about options and the lengths we go to for those options.

Adrienne and her husband Alex go through three heart-breaking miscarriages before she finally realizes she will never be able to carry a baby to term. So they decide to go the surrogacy route. A small village in India has become the hot-spot for women around the world unable to deliver their own babies. After going through IVF and egg-removal, her husband’s sperm is mixed with the author’s eggs then inserted into the surrogate. Ms. Arieff goes into great and painful details about this whole process. Not only did I appreciate her honesty, but it made me pray I will never have to go through it! Good lord. Even thinking about it now gives me the heebie-jeebies. The process works and their surrogate becomes pregnant. But going about her daily life in San Francisco while the woman carrying her children stays in India does not sit well with Ms. Arieff. She decides to fly back over and stay until the babies are born. By the end of the book, Adrienne, Alex, and their two healthy daughters return home to California and all is well with the world.

While Arieff is a good writer and crafts a powerful story, all throughout the novel I kept wondering: what’s so wrong with adoption? Did I skim the part where she mentions why they never consider it? If I did, I apologize and feel free to ignore my upcoming rant. I was just slighty offended by the end because of all the money and heartache and upheaval they went through to have children with their DNA. I mean, there are millions of kids out there with no parents, waiting for a family. Why couldn't they have adopted a child who desperately needs a home? :climbs off soapbox: Anyway, this was a short, interesting read and anyone who is considering surrogacy or wants to read a touching story about family should like it.

This Means War

Bridge of Scarlet Leaves
Kristina McMorris
Fiction

I picked this book up because the cover was pretty. Yes, I’m shallow and yes, I will inspect the back of a book if I find the front attractive. But I have to find the plot description interesting, which I did with this. It’s always fun discovering new authors, especially when they turn out to be good.

The main plot point of Bridge of Scarlet Leaves is World War II. The three characters we come to know and love are Maddie, Lane, and TJ. Maddie and TJ are brothers, Lane is TJ’s best friend and Maddie’s secret boyfriend because he’s Japanese and she is White. They decide to elope when they realize it’s the only way their families will ever accept them. Unfortunately, the day after they get married, Pearl Harbor is bombed and World War II begins. Thus begins a nightmare for all three of them, starting and ending with the war.

I really liked this book. The details were great, the dialogue sparkled, and I ended up liking every single character (even TJ, who started out being an ass). McMorris is very detailed about the joys and sorrows of war. Some scenes were so realistic they made me feel a little sick (I’m kind of a wimp when it comes to blood and violence). My only nitpick would be the end. I know war stories almost never end happily, but I was hoping this one would. Sadly, no. But it wasn’t so bad that it changed my mind about the rest of the book (don’t you hate when that happens, when you’re enjoying a book and then you get to the end and it’s so bad it just spoils everything you fell in love with?). Bridge of Scarlet Leaves is a great read, for fiction lovers and history buffs alike.

Love & Marriage

No Cheating, No Dying
Elizabeth Weil
Memoir

I should point out that this book’s full title is No Cheating, No Dying: I Had a Good Marriage. Then I Tried to Make It Better. So hopefully that gives you a little more of an idea what it’s about.

I’m not married. I’m not even in a relationship right now. But marriage fascinates me. I would like to get married someday and I write fiction, so even though I don’t know much about marriage, in a strange way, I feel like I do since I write about it so much. And I figured this book could at least educate me a little. Maybe even give me some tips for the future.

Elizabeth Weil has been married ten years at the start of No Cheating, No Dying, and she and her husband have two children. Their marriage is good, but she wants to make it better. To do this, she signs herself and her husband up for therapy, classes, and reads all sorts of self-help books. She ends up learning a lot, both about herself and her husband.

While I liked the book, it did get a little dry at times and I found myself skimming. I suppose that’s because I couldn’t relate to a lot of it. Which is understandable. I’m sure the ideal audience for this book is married people. Well, obviously it is. But I like to broaden my mind by reading anything I think sounds interesting. By the end I’d gotten to know Elizabeth and her husband quite well and I’m glad her self-improvement streak helped them. No Cheating, No Dying is a quick read filled with tips and tricks for improving your marriage and ideas on how to approach marriage in the future if you’re not. So everyone could read this and learn something from it. And really, aren’t those the best kind of books?

Make New Friends, But Keep the Old…

Friends Like Us
Lauren Fox
Fiction

…one is silver and the other is gold. Anyone else remember that classic gem from Girl Scouts? I still do. Ah, GS. I sure do miss going door-to-door to sell those damn cookies. Not. Ahem, where were we? Oh, yes, a book review.

Friends Like Us is the story of Willa, her best friend Jane, and her high school best friend Ben. She’s living with Jane and puttering along in a freelance career (oh, how I can relate to that) when she runs into Ben at their eight-year high school reunion (that’s such a random number. Do eight-year reunions really exist?) They lost touch after high school and she discovers it was because he had a crush on her and she never noticed. Willa introduces Ben to Jane and the two start dating. Willa’s not totally okay with it, but she deals. Then Jane and Ben announce they’re engaged and things start happening. Bad things. I’m not going to tell you what kinds of bad things because that would ruin the plot, but if you think long and hard about it, I’m sure you can guess.

Willa really got on my nerves. She was a total sad sack downer. Whining about her crappy job, her bad relationship with her brother, her parents’ traumatizing divorce, how much fun she and Ben used to have in high school and how it’s so awkward now because he’s with Jane. I occasionally appreciated her dry sense of humor, but most of the time she just annoyed me. And then there’s the horrible thing she does to her so-called “best friends”. I don’t know, I just could not empathize with Willa at all. Another irritating habit was the way she referred to her mother as Fran. Hello, what happened to "mom"? I know that was to show how isolated and distanced she was from her, but even if I despised my mother, I doubt I would think of her by her first name. I also wanted more dialogue. Always, always, more dialogue!

The end bugged me, too. What is wrong with these authors that think giving us an I’m-gonna-let-you-guys-decide-what-happens ending is what we want? Maybe some people do, but I sure as hell don’t. I want answers. I need answers. Urgh. This book. Since the main character is so annoying, I’m not sure I would recommend it. Read Friends Like Us at your own risk.

The Real Deal

You’re Not Doing It Right
Michael Ian Black
Memoir

Have you ever started reading a book, realized how hilarious and awesome it is, and then vowed to read it slower than usual because you didn’t ever want it to end? That is what happened to me with this book. I can probably count on one hand the number of times that has occurred in all of my 28 years, even though I’ve read thousands of books. My only complaint is that You’re Not Doing It Right should’ve been longer.

Michael Ian Black is a comedian who has hosted his own shows and been on several others (remember those I Love the insert decade here series?). He’s also a great writer. His humor totally translates to the page. He wrote another book (that is now on my list of must-reads) and a few children's books, too. But this one is all about his wife and kids and typical family matters. The story of how he met and fell in love with his wife is very interesting, not to mention brutally honest and laugh-out-loud funny. And the chapters about his experiences with his kids are awesome. I really don’t know what else to say except you have to read this. Of course, there’s always the chance that his humor isn’t up your alley because like I’ve mentioned before, humor is subjective, but…

Oh, hell, just read it. If you don’t love it, I’ll send you a dollar in the mail. With Michael Ian Black’s face on it.

Update: I bought this book today. That tells you how highly I think of it because believe me, I hardly ever buy books anymore (unless we're talking about cookbooks. Don't get me started on cookbooks).

Be Be Be My BFF

MWF Seeking BFF: My Yearlong Search for a New Best Friend
Rachel Bertsche
Memoir

I expected a flat-out memoir with this book and what I got instead was almost more of a self-help guide. Which is cool, I’m into self-help guides. Ms. Bertsche gives good advice and gets good advice, from quite a variety of sources.

MWF Seeking BFF is about a woman named Rachel Bertsche who ends up moving to Chicago with her husband. Her two bffs stayed behind in New York City and pretty soon, she starts longing for someone to go to brunch with on Sundays and call up any time of day to talk into getting a manicure (maybe it’s just me, but I would never call my best friend out of the blue and ask her if she wanted to get our nails done in thirty minutes. I’m a Virgo, people, I need advanced notice for these kinds of things!) She has plenty of casual friends but not that one special someone. So she starts a quest to go on 50 friend dates in one year and vows to have a new best friend by the time her challenge is over. Does she succeed? That is for me to know and for you to go read the book and find out.

I actually enjoyed this much more than I figured I would. I don’t give friendships much thought and Bertsche cites a lot of statistics and quotes experts about the healing and psychological power of friendship. She’s also really funny, and some of her friend dates end up being hilarious. My only quibble would be that I was also interested in her relationship with her husband, whom she long-distance dated in college. Apparently, he dumped her at one point but they obviously reconciled. I wanted to hear more about that. But then, I’m a romance lover at heart. And nosy.

I did get sick of her whining about not having a bff by the end of the book, however. She came off a little spoiled, especially considering she still had her two best friends back in NYC and she had lots of work friends and other casual friends surrounding her. It was like, geez, lady, get a grip. The fact that you don’t have one superclose, be-all, end-all best friend is not worth getting this worked up about. But I can be impatient sometimes, so maybe that was just me. I think most people would enjoy this, especially those who are looking to widen their social circles.

You Are What You Eat

Why Women Need Fat
William D. Lassek & Steven J.C. Gaulin
Diet & Health

Don’t we all know someone who is constantly on a diet? Maybe we are that someone. I’ll admit it, I find diet books kind of fascinating. I’ve read quite a few and let me tell you, after awhile, they are just hilarious. Each one will tell you why other diets fail you but why this one will finally have the answer! At first it sounds great, then after you’ve read enough of these books and seen lots and lots of failure, you finally just start to pick them up for an amusing way to kill a few hours. But this book actually made me sit up and take notice.

William Lassek and Steven Gaulin, both doctors, initially started doing research on why women have small waists, which then morphed into this book when they started noticing how much fat has to do with weight, especially when it comes to women. There’s all sorts of science-y mumbo-jumbo in here and yes, I did have to skim some parts because I felt my eyes start to glaze over at the idea of another biology lesson. But they have some good points and interesting data. Basically, we’re eating the wrong kinds of fat (soybean oil and vegetable oil are the biggest offenders and they are in everything! It’s a little depressing, actually) and at the end of the book, they tell you what kind of fat you need to eat to get yourself to your natural weight (the weight your body wants to be at and will always, always go back to when you lose more weight than you should). At some point I probably will try this way of eating because it just makes sense. Let me emphasize that Lassek and Gaulin stress a lot that their plan is not a diet. You just avoid all the bad oils and stick with eating natural foods that come from the earth. This will eventually lead you back to your natural weight.Not exactly a revolutionary idea, but one I’m sure more people probably need to hear.

Even if you’re not interested in dieting, there’s still a lot of intriguing stuff about women’s health, today and throughout history. So put down The South Beach Diet and grab Why Women Need Fat. Your body will thank you.

One is Not the Loneliest Number

Going Solo
Eric Klinenberg
Psychology

I like being by myself. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the company of my family and friends, but most of the time, I have no problem being alone. So when I heard about this book, I was very interested. Ironically, the subtitle is The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone. Why is this ironic? Well, because I currently live with my parents. I thought this book would be more about singledom, and parts of it were. But mostly it was about people living alone. By the end, I was really, really longing for my own apartment. Probably not what Klinenberg intended, but there you go.

This book took awhile to get going. Lots and lots of stats. But, of course, that is the curse of most non-fiction. Klinenberg did a lot of research and I commend him for that. I just wish there had been more personal accounts. Not that there weren’t, don’t get me wrong. I just wanted more. I definitely connect better when there’s a person with a name involved. Also, I skimmed a bit through the last few chapters about elderly folks living alone. Sorry, dude, I’m only twenty-eight. I don’t want to even think about when that’ll happen for me yet. Or my parents. I was most interested in the chapters on single people being happy alone and the stats on which countries this is most prevalent (Norway is number one, apparently. Those Norwegians love to be alone).

A lot of people have lived alone at some point in their lives, so I think most of us would enjoy this book. And if you’re not living alone, Going Solo will make you want to. Badly.

Thin Line Between Love & Hate

Letters From an Unknown Woman
Gerard Woodward
Fiction

This was one of those books. You know what I’m talking about. The kind where you start reading it and you think, eh, this isn’t that great, I don’t know if I want to keep reading. But you do and then you get to a really good part and you think, I’m glad I didn’t stop reading. Then you turn the page and suddenly you’re back to not liking the book. Then a few pages later, you like it again. I went back and forth on it all the way to the end. I cannot remember the last time that happened.

Letters From an Unknown Woman is about a woman (shocking, I know) named Tory Pace who lives in London during World War II. Her husband’s missing in action, her children have been sent away for their own protection, and her mother has come to live with her. She works in a gelatin factory, waiting and hoping for life to go back to normal. Then she gets a letter from Donald, the husband. He’s a POW, he misses her, and he really wants a dirty letter (he has his reasons, which he doesn't share with her). Tory is shocked, to say the least, especially when she receives more letters, each one more desperate than the next, begging her to describe all the filthy things she wants to do in the bedroom. Tory refuses, horrified her husband is acting so out-of-character, but then she becomes friendly with the owner of the factory and…well, I don’t to describe the whole plot of the book. Needless to say, a lot of stuff happens. Weird and surprising stuff.

One of the things I loved about this book was the subtle humor. I would read a line and actually smile, a rare feat for me because usually (I find) humor in fiction books is so over-the-top I end up rolling my eyes instead. But Woodward takes small moments and characters and injects quite a bit of comedy despite the serious setting. It took awhile for me to like Tory, but eventually she became my favorite character. And even though I hated Donald, there were a few moments where I understood where he was coming from and briefly sympathized with him. But then he went back to being an ass and I hated him all over again. This book had so many twists and turns. Sometimes I enjoyed them and sometimes I didn’t, but when I reached the final page, I was glad I picked it up and gave it a chance. You will be, too. Maybe. Probably. Oh, I don’t know, just go read it and tell me what you think.

Losing My Religion

Faith No More: Why People Reject Religion
Phil Zuckerman
Religion


I’m just gonna put it out there: I’m an atheist. Up until I was about fifteen, my parents had to force me to go to church. Pretty much every Sunday, they shook me awake, I put on a dress (that I had no problem with, I practically live in dresses and skirts), and then spent the next few hours thinking about God. They also made me go through confirmation, a horribly long process during which me and my friends had to do tasks and bonding exercises with the pastor before we stood in front of the whole church and were sanctioned “members”. And once I began a member, I stopped going. It was glorious. And kind of made no sense to me. I mean, I spent all those years going, put all that time into confirmation classes, and then I’m a full-fledged member and I don’t have to go anymore? The reality was, once I become a member, my parents stopped bugging me to come with them (it probably also had something to do with the fact that I was getting older and more insistent about staying in bed Sunday mornings).

The title of this book intrigued me since I am one of those people who rejected my religion. I wanted to hear about and read about why others did, too. And I was not disappointed. Phil Zuckerman does an excellent job breaking down why and how different people all over the world turn their backs on their religion. He conducted countless interviews and uses them to paint a fascinating portrait of a group of people greatly misunderstood. I worried at first that the book might be a little dry, but my worries were unfounded. I read this book in a day, that’s how good it was. While the subject matter might be uncomfortable for most people, I think everyone would be wise to pick up a copy. It gives a better, deeper understanding of why a lot of us these days are atheist or agnostic. Zukerman breaks these reasons down into individual chapters, devoting each to a different reason why people left their faith. Some examples include Stopped Making Sense, Misfortune, and Sex and Sexuality. There are more, but I found those ones the most interesting.

I highly recommend this book to everyone, religious and non-religious alike. We can all learn something from it.

Blood is Thicker Than Water

The Old Romantic
Louise Dean
Fiction


This book lost me quite a few times. Not in the sense that I had to put it down because I was fed up with it, but because I got confused. There were POV changes and flashbacks and so many different people that I had to pay very close attention and read every single word. It was exhausting.

The Old Romantic is the convoluted tale of Ken, Nick, Dave, June, Pearl, Astrid and a bunch of other people. But those six are all connected via family ties. Of course, Louise Dean doesn’t bother to give us the family’s last name. Can I just say how much that irks me? I like knowing those kinds of little details. In fact, when I’m writing, one of my favorite parts is thinking up character names—first and last. Anyway, Ken’s a cranky old bugger who’s been estranged from his son for awhile but decides he’s ready to die now and wants to make peace. With Nick (who used to be Gary and don’t ask me why he changed his name because I’m pretty sure it was never explained), who is living with Astrid, who has a daughter, but not by him, because they’re not married. Dave is Niry’s younger brother, who actually is happy with his wife and kids (unlike pretty much every other guy in this book). Then there’s June, Ken’s second wife, who is very unhappy. But not as much as Pearl, his first wife, because... Well, I won’t give it away. Mainly because I’m already sick of explaining it all.

I loved the details of the English towns. Being part English myself and having been to the UK a lot, I love reading descriptions of the lovely small towns and thatched-roof homes. That’s probably the only thing I loved about this book, though. The POV switches way too much and without breaks so one second you’re hearing Astrid’s thoughts and then suddenly Niry’s bitching and moaning about something. I hate that. It takes me out of the novel when I have to stop and blink at the page and wonder who the hell’s head we’re in now and who’s this new lady, how is she related to these other people. The end is weird, too. Nothing is really resolved. You have two characters just watching TV and then boom. The End. None of the characters are particularly likeable, either. I’ll give Louise Dean props for making them three-dimensonal and mostly interesting, but by the time I got to the middle, I realized I didn’t give a damn whether any of them lived or died.

I suppose someone who is into the gloomy everydayness of life might like this novel. But if frequent POV changes and lots of characters popping in and out give you a headache, you should skip this one.

Keeping It in the Family

Reunion
Therese Fowler
Fiction


I read Therese Fowler’s latest book, Exposure, earlier this year and liked it quite a bit. So when I scanned the author bio at the back and realized she’d written an earlier one called Reunion, I quickly jotted it down on my to-read list. Sadly, I was disappointed when I reached the last page.

Reunion is the tale of Blue Reynolds, an Oprah-style talk show host who is thrown back into the past when she runs into her ex down in Key West where she’s shooting a show. He’s filming a TV pilot and she agrees to help. Then his son shows up and she quickly realizes there’s an attraction between them. Oh, and she’s also looking for the baby she gave up for adoption eighteen years ago. Who might or might not be her ex-lover’s. Thus making her would-be lover her baby’s half-brother.

Sounds interesting, right? Well, it was. Sort of. Things started off on the wrong foot on the first page, though, when I saw an italicized prologue. I hate italics and I hate prologues. It’s a known fact that reading six pages of italicized words hurts your brain. And 90% of the time, prologues are unnecessary. This one falls into that category. Let’s discuss Therese Fowler’s writing style: TMI. While she writes good descriptions, she just sticks way too much extra crap in there that does not add to the scene or move the story along. Sorry, Ms. Fowler, but I don’t care what Blue’s apartment in Chicago used to look like before she gave it a million-dollar remodel, thanks. Give me more scenes with her sister whom she’s had a bitter rivalry with her whole life. She writes good dialogue but there needs to be more. Show, don’t tell.

Then there’s the part of the book where we’re in limbo for awhile wondering if the son she gave up for adoption is Mitch’s (the ex lover and father of Julian, the guy she likes). Maybe I just wasn’t paying attention (I’ll be honest, I skimmed a lot, especially when I saw more descriptions coming up) and should’ve picked up the clues earlier that he wasn’t, but I was a little more than skeeved out by her stringing us along before we finally found out, no, Mitch and Blue had never actually gotten physical before they split so the kid she gave up wasn't his. The end also disappointed me. I know in real life things aren’t neatly wrapped up with a little bow all the time, but I wanted that to happen in this book. Because I really did like Blue, despite all the waxing poetic about macaws and porch railings.

I’ll definitely read the next new Therese Fowler book, but I’ll be sure to check the plot summary first. And be prepared to skim. A lot.

Call Me Maybe

I’ve Got Your Number

Sophie Kinsella

Fiction

Ah, Sophie Kinsella. I first discovered her Shopaholic series years ago and I was hooked. Utterly and completely hooked on Rebecca Bloomwood and her addiction to shopping. So of course I wanted to read her new one. And…I was not impressed. It reminded me of how the first few Shopaholic books were good and then after about the fourth one, they started to go downhill. That’s what I’ve Got Your Number was like. It’s the story of a woman named Poppy who loses her phone and finds another one in the trash, picks it up and weird things start to happen. I had quite a few issues with this book, despite Kinsella’s snappy writing.

Issue #1: Footnotes. I get it, they were part of the plot and supposed to be funny, add a little extra humor to whatever Poppy was going on about. But footnotes are effing annoying. I dislike them in non-fiction books and I dislike them even more in fiction (luckily, most fiction books don’t have footnotes).

 Issue #2: Too much going on. When I first picked up the book, I thought maybe I’d grabbed the Large Print addition by accident. Nope, it really was that long. There were so many plots and plot twists that by the end I was just ready for it to be over.

Issue #3: Characters. I’m just gonna say it: Sam, the hero, was way too much like Luke, the hero in the Shopaholic series. Both businessmen, not used to sharing their feelings, cold, snappy, need a carefree woman to lighten them up. Sam was Luke 2.0, basically. And then there’s Poppy. While she was mostly sympathetic, there were also times I wanted to slap her and call her what she was, a freaking moron. For the replacement ring scheme (so stupid) to coming thisclose to marrying her committment-phobe fiancé. Good lord, she was aggravating.

So while the writing was good, I did not care much for the plot or the characters. I’d recommend this to Sophie Kinsella fans only. Everyone else will hate it and make fun of chic lit even more than they already do.

Chef's Choice

Talking With my Mouth Full: My Life as a Professional Eater
Gail Simmons
Memoir

I’m gonna be honest, I am not a reality show fan. “Candid” or competitive. I don’t watch them, don’t want to watch them. So when I initially saw this book on the shelf at the library, I skipped past it when I caught the words Host of Top Chef: Just Desserts. But then my eyes came back to it again at the My Life as a Professional Eater part. Hmmm, she might have some interesting stuff to say about food. And I do love food. So I stuck this baby in my bag, hoping Ms. Simmons’ book wouldn’t be too swallowed up by her reality TV experiences.

Luckily for me, it wasn’t. She’s led an interesting life, staring in Toronto and finally ending up in NYC. She’s gone to culinary school, written for food magazines and newspapers, worked as an assistant to a famous chef, slaved away at several critically-aclaimed restaurants, and now juggles two shows. Impressive, I must say. She’s also a great writer: funny, descriptive, interesting. And what can I say about her food descriptions? Divine. Made me hungry.

The only part where I lost interest was when she talked about certain seasons of Top Chef and gave behind-the-scenes scoop on contestants. I’m sure Top Chef fans will enjoy that part, but the thing was, even the sections I didn’t care about were interesting. That’s the sign of a good book. She also drops plenty of cooking and baking tips along the way (most I already knew, but still, I never get bored reading about food). This is a great read for any Top Chef fan, competitive reality show junkie, or even your average foodie. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to figure out what to have for lunch…

The Queen and I

A Magnificent Obsession
Helen Rappaport
History

I’m not sure when I started getting into history books as recreational reading, but it definitely started sometime in college (probably after I took that American History class and got one of my very few As at the end of the semester). Needless to say, I’m not a certain period snob, either. I love reading about everything—the American Civil War, both World Wars, the Renaissance era…you name it and give me an interesting book on the subject and I’ll read it. So when I saw this book, read the awesome title, and realized it was about English Royalty? I was in, baby. All in.

A Magnificent Obsession is about Queen Victoria and her obsessive, undying love for her beloved husband (and cousin), Prince Albert. According to the author, Helen Rappaport, much has been written about Victoria and Albert’s love story and about Victoria’s legacy after he died, but not much information has been given about the period of time starting from Albert’s decline until about ten years after his death. This book delves into all that, leaving no detail unturned.

I struggle sometimes with history books. I am a dialogue person, through and through. When I start reading a page, my eyes immediately go to the white parts because that’s where the action is usually happening. So reading these kinds of books is hard for me, especially if they’re really dense and dull. Thankfully, this book was not. Despite the lack of dialogue, I found myself intrigued. Rappaport gives an in-depth, fascinating look at a Queen whose entire life hinged on her husband and when he died, she fell apart. And while Prince Albert did not feel entirely comfortable living up to his wife’s worshipful image of him, he pulled the strings behind the scenes. She wanted his opinion and advice on everything when it came to running the country. Victoria was what we would call these days coda. As in co-dependent. One part of the book quotes her as saying she could barely stand her kids, always preferring the company of her husband. Where was a good marriage counselor when you needed one?

Rappaport uses letters and historical documents from Victoria and Albert, as well as their children, friends, colleagues, and subjects to paint a picture of a devastating time for England and Europe. Her writing is tight and crisp and she creates tension nicely while building to Albert’s death. History buffs and English enthusiasts in general will like this book. And if they don’t? Off with their heads! Or maybe, since they'd stopped doing beheadings by then, off to the dungeon!

Sugar Sugar

Paris, My Sweet: A Year in the City of Light (and Dark Chocolate)
By Amy Thomas
Memoir

The cover of this book caught my attention first. I saw pink and white and the words Paris and Sweet. Then I saw the little drawings of madeleines, cupcakes, and pastries. A book about bakeries and Paris, two of my favorite things? That sucker went in my bag right away (my mom even commented later that she meant to grab it, to which I say mom, when we go to the library together, you know if you’re even slightly interested in a book you have to snap it up before I do).

This memoir is an easy read. It will also make you crave baked goods so badly that you’ll start wondering how many excellent bakeries there are in your city and before you know it, you’re Googling like a crazy woman and all these bake shops come up that you had no idea existed and you write each one down and wonder how in the world you will have the time and gas money to visit them all…Err, where were we? Oh, yeah. Book review. Sometimes when I start thinking about sugar my brain gets completely off-track.
Now, while I liked this book and I found Amy Thomas a relateable and descriptive writer (especially when it comes to croissants—oh, Lordy, I can practically taste the pain au chocolat), I wouldn’t say it’s the best memoir of Paris and sweets I’ve ever read. That honor goes to David Lebovitz’s The Sweet Life in Paris. Not only does his book include recipes, but it is hee-larious. Yeah, that’s right, I spelled hilarious phonetically. Because his book is that funny. Deal with it. So I couldn’t help comparing the two along the way and while Amy Thomas has a few amusing comments or anecdotes here and there, she didn’t consistently crack me up like my pal Davey did.

However, I would definitely recommend this book to anyone living in Paris and/or New York City. If you live anywhere else, you’re out of luck because at the end of every chapter, she gives her top picks of all the various bakeries in NYC and Paris that sell whatever sugary concoction she has just described in exquisite detail. Oh, you want some examples? Okay, but I’m starting to get hungry here. Bonbons, macarons, crumbles, chocolate chip cookies, and french toast/pain perdu just to name a few (because drool is starting to splatter on my laptop). The parts of the book where she talks about her bad love life and her stressful job and missing her New York friends are not quite as interesting. I kept thinking, who cares, tell me more about the carrot cupcake with sea salt caramel frosting! But I’m more of a food than people person (Just kidding. Sort of. Kind of. Don’t ever ask me to choose between my sister and Milky Way cupcakes).

Paris, My Sweet is a delicious memoir/guidebook and the perfect read for anyone with a sweet tooth. Bon appetite!